A Beginner’s Guide to Living Simply with a Family
Have you ever wanted to live more simply, but think it’s not possible because you have a family? It’s okay. I get it. No really, I’m walking in those shoes too.
We’ve been sold a lie of More is Better. But, it think deep down we know that it’s a lie because no matter how much more we buy or cram into our already packed basements and garages, we still crave more. Does it ever end?
This was the one of the questions I faced with my family not too long ago. We’ve never been ones to just go with the flow, but everyday we are bombarded with messages that we need more to be happy so it can feel like a never ending battle when you are trying to opt out.
What is Simple Living?
Generally when one speaks of simple living, they mean living with less. And while, I agree with the idea that “less is more”, this is not a life of depravity or living like a martyr.
And the idea of simple living applies to more than just your stuff. Yes, while minimalism plays a part and having less clutter does make life easier (we traveled for a whole year recently!), living simply - especially with a family - includes incorporating the simplicity mindset.
I will admit, while I love the fact that the minimalist movement has shined a spotlight on the fact that we do not need a bunch of stuff to be happy, I can’t help but feel like living with almost nothing is not quite right for me or my family.
Maybe I’ll get there one day, but I don’t like the idea of living with only 100 personal items or only having one plate per person in my home. We enjoy having others over to our home and I love wrapping up in a fluffy towel after a hot shower - although we only have 2 towels for each person and we have gotten rid of the guest towels. *gasp*
So even though I am a work in progress, and we continue to improve upon our living simply journey, I wanted to share with you 9 ways we have learned to add simplicity to our everyday lives.
How Can I Add Simplicity to My Family?
1. Write Down Your Dream Life
The only way to make real, sustainable change is to connect on a deep level with WHY you want to make the change. Things will get hard and you will face some obstacles along the way. The clearer you are with why you want to live a simpler life, the easier it will be to keep moving forward.
Do you want to live more simply so you can save money and take the family vacation of your dreams before the kids leave home?
Do you want your home to be a relaxing retreat after a long day?
Do you want to stop running all over town completing errands, shuttling your kids, and feeling more like a taxi service than mom?
The more specific and clearer your goal, the easier it will be for you to set your simplicity goals, cut back on the non-essentials, and start enjoying life again.
2. Start Small
This one is tough when you are first starting out and full of momentum and energy, but smaller changes are more sustainable overtime so it’s important to be deliberate with our actions.
Look at each are of your life and make one change at a time. You can always speed up as you gain momentum. For instance, look at your schedule and opt out of one upcoming event or obligation you do not want or need to attend.
Another idea is to simplify your closet through a trial capsule wardrobe. Challenge yourself to only wear 10 pieces for two weeks. This travel capsule wardrobe shows you how to make 72+ outfits from only 12 articles clothing so you should be able to make it 14 days with 10 pieces.
The point is to make changes that you can test out and make sure you enjoy it before donating everything or removing yourself from all social engagements. Both are extremes and probably not the kind of life that makes your heart sing.
3. Get Rid of Duplicates
One of the easiest ways to simplify your life is to get rid of any duplicates you have. This is one of my favorite minimalism tricks because you get to declutter without feeling a tinge of hesitation of needing an item at a later date. You’ll still have it because you kept the better of the two (or three) that you had.
This works great in the kitchen for things like can openers, ice cream scoops, wine openers, and appliances that overlap in function.
But, it also works great in your closet for things like back t-shirts, jeans that are the same cut and style, shoes, and accessories.
So, if you want to declutter, but are having a hard time actually donating your stuff, start with tossing your duplicates. It’s the easiest way to get the ball rolling.
4. Give Things a Home
Do you ever ask your child to put their toys away? Of course your do. We all do. The funny thing is that we don’t always do this as an adult. I think it’s because we know that we are responsible for the cleaning up in the end so we don’t always follow the advice we give our own children.
But, if we would just assign our things a home and put them away when we use them, our homes would never be messy.
Let that sink in…our homes would NEVER be messy.
5. Spend Quality Time with People
The idea that we should value people over stuff is one of the tenements of The Minimalists and I whole heartedly agree.
As you are incorporating a more simple lifestyle for yourself and your family, carve out time to spend it with the people you love and love to be around. Go on playdates. Go on child/parent dates. Go on dates with your spouse.
The main idea here is to get away from your stuff and connect with another human being.
6. Get Outside
Speaking of getting away from your stuff, another way to start living more simply with your family is to get outside and enjoy nature.
Go for a hike or a bike ride. Get out to the beach or the lake. Go to the mountains or just take a walk around the block after dinner. It really doesn’t matter as long as it’s outside. There is just something special that happens when we get back to nature.
And don’t let the weather stop you. Easy for me to say, I know, we now live in San Diego with great weather year round. But, we have lived in Chicago, Denver, Des Moines, and Munich. All places with 4 seasons and cold winters so I know what it’s like to live in the elements.
7. Gift Experiences Instead of Stuff
On the next gift-giving holiday that comes up, try to opt out of getting and giving more stuff. Instead, ask for and give experiences. Honestly, experiences are the gifts that keep on giving and the things memories are made of.
For small gifts you could give passes to the movie theater, a dinner gift card, or babysitting services for the night. You could even package all three for a bigger gift for new parents. For bigger gifts you could ask for or give annual passes to local theme parks, zoos, or museums. As a family you could gift each other an awesome family vacation instead of individual Christmas gifts and have fun picking out a place to go.
Experiences and activities are great to enjoy throughout the year, stimulate the kids minds, and keep your home clutter-free. Win - win - win.
8. Go on a Spending Freeze
Another way to live simply and experiment with minimalism is to go on a spending freeze. This does not mean you can’t spend any money at all, but it means that you only spend money on essential things like food and personal hygiene products. However, in order to get the full benefit of a spending freeze you can set yourself a lower than normal budget for these items too.
A spending freeze forces you to get creative with the items you already own - putting together clothes/outfits in a new way for instance or making meals out of that forgotten pasta in the back of the pantry.
The other benefit to a spending freeze is that it can show you that you do not need to spend money to have fun. Some of our favorite activities include going to the beach or playing at the park and neither of these cost any money.
9. Do a Little Bit Everyday
We all have a dream of the life we want to be living and I’m here to let you in on a little secret…there are parts of it you can add to your life today. Really, I mean it.
You can add in simple luxuries to your everyday life so that you can increase your joy without breaking the bank. Sure, it things are really tight, you may not be able to make some upgrades just yet, but I think most of us either spend mindlessly in an attempt to feel better or choose to purchase the item that costs a few bucks less in order to save money, but isn’t really what we want.
For instance, I was talking with a friend about eating out and I said that I love to share meals because it let’s me try a few different items especially breakfast when I want both the sweet and savory options. The problem is my husband HATES sharing. My friend pointed out that for a few extra bucks, I could get both meals. And if I’m the only one eating them, I’ll have plenty of leftovers to bring home and enjoy again. So true!
This is one of the ways we can indulge in simple luxuries without having to wait to win the lottery (because let’s be honest, you have to play to win and the chances are slim).
Now, eating different food may not be your thing, but you can see that adding a few select indulgences will add fullness and joy to your life. It’s like we get to cheat the system because we’re going against the norm and doing something just for ourselves.
I love adding these simple luxuries to my everyday life so much that I created a calendar full of them along with some decluttering tips, and healthy simple habits. You can get a free month of the calendar with daily simple living prompts here.
Hi, I’m Deanna!
Busy mama, turned practical minimalist. I’m on a mission to show other families that minimalism is possible with kids - and it doesn’t have to mean throwing out everything you own!
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I hope you can see that living simply is a mindset and is totally possible - even with a family. We all make choices everyday and I am committed to making choices that lead to a more fulfilling, simpler, and happier life for me and my family while taking care of our loved ones and the environment. I hope you’ll join me.
